The Tobacco Control Protection Racket

I have had a very quite day today. I decided yesterday that it should be so. Just a few chores and then nothing more except resting and reading. Well, apart from separating a pile of yellowed baccy plant leaves, attaching them to hooks made from paper-clips and putting them into the curing box to dry at a cozy 41ºC. Oh, and spreading bonemeal around the base of my plants and watering it in.

During my reading, I came across an amusing idea – protection money. I can’t remember the context really, but it led me to think.

Here is a little story that I have made up:

A chap buys a pub. He invests a little money, not too much, to tart the place up. His trade is not great, but enough to get by. After a couple of months, a quite well-dressed ‘gent’ comes in accompanied by two very large rather ugly looking men. “Are you the owner?”, asks the guy. “Yes. What can I get you?”, the chap replies. “Can we have a chat somewhere quiet?”, asks the ‘gent’. “Oh, OK”, the chap replies.

So they go into a quiet corner and sit down. The two uglies stand close by, looking around.

“You see”, says the ‘gent’, “Running a pub is a dangerous business”.

“Eh?”, the chap says, “I’ve been running bars since I was a young man and never had any problems. How do you mean?”

“Well”, says the ‘gent’, “This is a rough area. There are some problematical people. They can give you a lot of trouble”.

“Nah”, says the publican, “I’ve had no trouble at all”.

At that, the ‘gent’ picks up a glass and drops it on the floor where it smashes to pieces. “See what I mean?”, he says.

“Damn it! What are you doing?”, cries the publican.

The ‘gent’ replies, “That’s nothing compared with what the other thugs (nodding towards the two uglies) can do”.

“What do you want?”, says the publican.

“OK”, says the ‘gent’. “If you want to stop the damage, and I insist that you do, then you have to stop the behaviour”.

“What behaviour?”

“You’ll have to stop the low-lives smoking”.

“What!!”, cries the publican, “And drive 50% of my customers away? Are you kidding?”

“Not at all”, whispers the ‘gent’, “And please keep your voice down. Tell you what”, says ‘the gent,”I’ll make you an offer you can’t refuse. If you do as I demand, I’ll not charge you protection costs. Right? The charges – fines if you like – are very high. Do as I demand pronto from this time next week and we shall not trouble you again. Deal?”

“I don’t like at all”, says the publican. “How is my business going to survive?”

The ‘gent’ picks up another glass and hurls it at the wall, smashing it to pieces. The uglies step closer and one pulls out a baseball bat from under his coat. The gent rises, looks down at the publican, and says, “I don’t want to come in here this time next week and see a single person smoking. Capish?” With that, he and his thugs turn and walk out.

The publican contacts other local pubs and finds out that they have all had a visit. One off them contacted the police, but the officer said that there was nothing that they could do. The gang was protected by some organisation with high political contacts. Apparently, the organisation was called ‘Public Health’ which operated through ‘the gang’ (a secretive group known by the acronym ‘NGO’), which had units all over the country called ‘Environmental Health Officers’.

A couple of publicans tried to fight against the protection racket by refusing to use force to stop smokers smoking, but to no avail. Protection money was demanded. One, who couldn’t pay, was kidnapped and held prisoner until a ransom was paid.

And so the publicans had no option but to suffer the costs of loss of business for fear of suffering even greater losses, and so they were forced to use force to throw their best and most loyal customers into the street. Many of them never returned. Gradually, many pubs closed because the publicans could not afford the loss of business and dared not risk the additional cost of protection money and possible kidnapping and ransom demands. So they gave up.


Some time later, in a smoke-free room in Public Health Headquarters, a high-level meeting was held. The CEO, known only by single name ‘Darnot’, reported as follows:

“Ladies” (for all the members were female members of the secret society known as ‘Feminazi’), “I am pleased to say that the plan has been a great success. It was not easy to persuade the Wastemonster Gang to lend us their operatives, but, thanks to their (well-paid-for!) help, we were able to get publicans to antagonise their best clients and thus sign their own death warrants, so to speak. (Sniggers heard around the room). As a result, thousands of pubs have closed down. Many of these closed pubs (our primary targets, as you know) were places where men tended to gather in groups, wasting money and talking when the should be at home looking after the kids while we go to meetings and the hairdressers. Most of the pubs which were women and children friendly are still there.

But we must not rest on our laurels. There is still the matter of minimum pricing. As you know, the men who smoke now sit at home guzzling cheap booze from the supermarket while we have to pay top price for our martinis.  Much good work is being done behind the scenes. SamCam has committed to subtly tweaking Cam. Didn’t she do well re plain packs and kids in cars!!!

Finally, a little snippet. I have it on good authority that those banks where Wastemonster has share holdings are going to be released from bondage, and that the shares are going to jump in value shy high. So buy, buy, buy.”


Enough of such imaginings. But is it not true that a monopoly, Public Health (aka ‘criminal gang’), forced publicans, against their will, to force smokers outdoors? And is it not true that fines for not so doing were, in effect, reverse ‘protection money’? It seems to me that the two situations are the opposite sides of the same coin.

  1. Protection Money: “Money extracted from a person to protect that person from a risk of danger which is predominantly likely to be created by the person demanding the protection money”.
  2. Reverse Protection Money: “Protective action demanded to avoid a risk of danger which is defined by the demander. Failure to act will result in a demand for money aka a fine”

If people demanding ‘protection money’ are criminals, then so are people who demand ‘reverse protection money’.

Well, at least these thoughts are fun and relieve the tedium of political correctness.


Finally tonight, I recommend that readers watch this video. It is called “Why Smoking Does Not Cause Lung Cancer”.

It is from an Israeli doctor. He does not say that smoking is not dangerous. What he says is that there are two factors – the force of the tumour to grow, and the force of the body to resist that growth. He actually talks about the Doll Doctors Study, and explains how the ‘delayed effect’ of smoking harm might work. He proposes:

A) Smoking causes inflammation of the surface cells of the bronchial tubes.

B) That allows viruses to invade.

C) The viruses cause the mutations which result in cancerous cells.

D) Whether tumours develop depends upon the ability of the body to resist.

I must watch it again because I did not quite catch it all, but one think that he said struck me. He mentioned the German Minister who was a chain smoker. I forget his name. He was in his 90s and still going strong. According to this doctor (if I got the drift correctly) Herr Schmitt (???) has the precursor condition, dysplasia, meaning abnormal cells, but has not suffered the viral infection or the appearance of tumours. In other words, his body has RESISTED successfully and is still doing so. The main point is that the delayed effect is caused by the ability of the body to resist. Herr Schmitt’s body has a great ability to resist whereas many people’s bodies have much less resistance.

I think that what he was really saying was that viruses are constantly trying to invade and that they are what cause the mutations in epithelial cells (the epithelial cells are those which form the ‘skin’ of the bronchial tubes), and that inflammation of the cells due to smoking (or anything else!) lets the viruses in. But most people resist and destroy those viruses before they can cause cell mutation. Some people are weaker than others in that respect, which explains the variations in ages, smoking status, etc when LC appears.

So, in a way, it is similar to the cause of malaria. Blaming smoking for LC is like blaming ‘bad air’ from swamps for malaria. With malaria, swamps are ideal places for mosquitoes to breed. Mosquitoes carry the parasite which is injected into the body, and it is the parasite which creates the poisons which might result in death. Thus, smoking might produce inflammation, which might produce ideal conditions for viruses, which might cause cell mutations, which might evade the body’s defences. And, of course, the older you are, the more likely that your body’s defences might be weak.

Thus you get this sort of graph:



The Israeli doctor actually used the original graph from which the above was taken to illustrate the difference between age at death of smokers as compared with non-smokers. What do you observe? Initially, it is that smokers die well before non-smokers. What is not so obvious, even though it is in plain sight, is that, between the ages of 40 and 60, there is an initial spurt of deaths. Not an awful lot, but more pronounced among smokers than non-smokers. But then something strange happens. Rather than the lines on the chart continuing to diverge (because the heaviest smokers die more and more rapidly), they come closer together!! That means that non-smokers are starting to peg out more rapidly than smokers!

In the end, all of them are dead. One might reasonably ask which groups had the most fun; which groups had the most pleasure; which groups were happiest; which groups were content. Strangely, the probability is that smoking had nothing whatsoever to do with such things, since only in the last couple of decades has what was considered to be a practice as normal as breathing been converted into a ‘guilt trip’.

WE ALL FEEL IT. When the nurse comes to see to herself’s dressings and rings the doorbell, I JUMP to put out my cig – well, not quite as bad as that, but you get my meaning. The GUILT has been implanted. But wait! Guilt of what? It certainly isn’t guilt of smoking, nor is it guilt of harming the nurses. What is it?

It is AVOIDANCE OF POTENTIAL DISPUTE. That is all. Nothing else. It is not ‘guilt’ at all, although it feels like guilt. It is ‘the easy way’, that is all. There is nothing wrong with ‘the easy way’. It could also be described as ‘give and take’, or ‘common sense’. It means, “We have an invalid to care for. Let’s avoid confrontations for the ten minutes or so that the events require”


We all aspire, as best we can, with our neighbours and acquaintances, to AVOID POTENTIAL DISPUTES. That is because we do not wish to kill each other – a reasonable aspiration.

The Tobacco Control Industry aspires to do entirely the opposite. It conspires, aspires, hopes and acts to produce disputes – disputes as violent as possible. Smoking bans are violence. Forcing publicans to throw smokers out of pubs is violence. Throwing publicans into jail for not forcing people not to smoke in pubs is totalitarian, fascist torture.

Gosh! I have gone on tonight!

I hope that it is entertaining at least.





6 Responses to “The Tobacco Control Protection Racket”

  1. michaeljmcfadden Says:

    Excellent tale about the Protection Racket run by the TC Mob Junican! And that is indeed exactly what it is.

    Helmut Schmidt by the way is the German Prime Minister (?) Chancellor(?)’s name. There’s also a story going the rounds about him storing up something like 20,000 menthol cigarettes in anticipation of a ban on menthols.

    – MJM

  2. thelastfurlong Says:

    Reblogged this on The Last Furlong and commented:
    Thoroughly entertaining post!

  3. elenamitchell Says:

    What can I say? Most of my family survived into ripe old age despite smoking sixty untipped Woodbines a day. The only ones who died young didn’t smoke. Apart from my stepmother. But then it would have taken a never heard of plague to kill her off before she was ninety.
    So I opted for the smoking cure. Geddit, Cure?
    I have now been smoking for sixty years, and doing fine. I can’t jump a stile anymore. But I blame that on falling off a horse several times and wrecking my knees.

    • junican Says:

      Do you want to jump stiles? At 76, I cannot run 100 yards, but what would I want to run 100 yards for?
      Keep taking the medicine……..

Comments are closed.

%d bloggers like this: