I Am Worried to Death

I am worried to death. I do not know what to make of it. I must have cancer. To employ Tobacco Control verbiage, ‘it is worrying’ and ‘of some concern’ that I have had a sore throat for a couple of weeks. Since I smoke a lot, the fact that I have a sore throat can only mean one thing – I have some sort of curiously named cancer. What else can explain the sore throat which will not go away?

Further, my eyes seem to be tired all the time. That must mean that tobacco smoke has entered into my eyes and made them cancerous. It can be the only explanation.

I poo regularly each day about two hours after rising. That too must indicate abnormality since my wife only poos every two days. There must be something wrong with me, mustn’t there? It must be cancer, obviously.

I came home from the pub a while ago. I drank three pints and I am now enjoying a glass of red wine. My throat is sore, so the alcohol must have caused me to get throat cancer and eye cancer. My condition must be ‘of major concern’ and ‘very worrying’ to Arnott and all the representatives of The British Medical Association. After all, ‘Members’ of that august body have expressed ‘concerns’ about the proliferation of ecigs.

But it is worse than that. I have toothache. I have an appointment at the dentist in a few days time. The site of the ache is a cap which is wobbling like mad. It is loose. Why should it be loose? It must be tooth cancer, obviously. I am terrified of going to the dentist in case he pronounces the death sentence. “You will be taken from this place to an appointed place in a waiting room, and thence transferred to cemetery or incinerator and God help your soul”.


I jest, sort of. The toothache is real. The sore throat is real. What would Judge Judy make of it? But there is a real point. Is it possible for a tooth infection to spread around? Can such an infection spread through your bloodstream and made you feel lethargic and achy throughout your body? I do not see why not. After all, bacterial infection does things like that.


Which brings us to an interesting question:

“To what extent is ASH ET AL AND TOBACCO CONTROL GENERALLY MAKING PEOPLE ILL? ‘Worries, concerns, fears’ make people ill. That is a well-known fact. Unfortunately, the ‘worries, concerns, fears’ claimed by ASH ET AL are not real, otherwise they would make Arnott and co ill. It is clear beyond doubt that ASH ET AL use words like ‘concern, worry, fear’ for no other reason than to promote precisely those ‘concerns, worries and fears’. That is why they use those words.

It is weird that our elected representatives have fallen for this hysteria, for that is what it is. Words like ‘concern, worry, fear’ prove it. No scientist would use such emotional words.


The General Smoking Ban is based exactly upon such emotions. It has nothing to do with the health of workers. SHS levels are way, way below what the ‘Health and Safety at Work’ executive claim to be safe or unsafe levels of toxins. But that department is silent, silent, silent.

“Evidence base policy” is fatally flawed. The reason is that when elected representatives defer to ‘experts’ who provide the evidence, they hand over to the experts the law-making privilege. Elected representatives become tools, and they themselves give their powers away.

Incredible, is it not?




2 Responses to “I Am Worried to Death”

  1. Carlos Says:

    Well said,but I am worried about leaving the house.i might get run over,or even worse get lung cancer from all the trafic pollution.You never can be to carfull in this day and age.

    • junican Says:

      You are obviously quite right, Carlos. I notice that more and more people who are not actually workers on some site are wearing high vis jackets these days. Have you noticed that? Clearly, it’s time that the government (aka the ‘experts’) forced everyone to wear such garb along with high-viz, light-emitting surgical masks. The would need to be high-viz and light-emitting masks so that policemen could see them, especially in the dark.

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